Yes I went to bed at 4:30am and I wasn’t even wasted.

Why?

I was the damn designated driver again! Why can’t someone just do this job for a change so I can finally get drunk?? Partying responsibly sucks big time.

We started out the night slowly. We managed to get our asses to Cafe De Moc, thanks to my then sober friend, Bon. Damn it Lost Boy, I was like the only one in costume there! Wish I could have stayed longer though but my vote was outnumbered. My fate was under their control, if I went against their wishes I would have had to walk home.

Bon was in control pretty much the first half of the night, until he got hold of his own bottle of Red Label (which I paid for?!). Last night I went out with two of the most responsible, non-partying, sober, young adults I have ever known. Or so I thought. Nam and Bon once appeared to me as those type of people you sit with in class when you need to copy the work, or the ones you go for some mature advice when you need your childish little head knocked into senses, or the ones who hold up your hair, telling you everything is going to be alright while you’re puking your guts out all over the toilet walls. These perceptions I have of them have forever changed last night.

I don’t remember when it all started going down hill for them. But when I saw Bon and Nam started their competitive drinking tournament, I knew it wouldn’t be pretty. Minutes later they started shaking and dancing, embarrassing all of us. The only difference between the two is that Nam knew she was drunk while Bon was all like “I’m not drunk, I can still stand” and then he toppled over on the spongy sofa bed on the second floor of Escobar. Surprisingly Bua wasn’t the drunken pain last night. The lack of sobriety of those two made her sober.

Then it was 2am and none of them could walk. Me, Bua, and Bon’s Chinese friend Dee were like these late night Por Tek Tung workers picking up their lifeless bodies off the side of the road, shoving them into the car. Equipped with their own individual plastic bags, we finally managed to leave.

Then I assumed the role of the responsible one on the driver’s seat. The night could have ended at 2am but no I got my duty to fulfill. Dropping off Dee around ABAC Hua Mak was nothing. Funniest thing was that last night we passed Bua’s house twice before she could really go home. The expression “So close yet so far” was in full effect. She had to help me “take care” of these two lifeless beings before we both could finally get some sleep.

Nam, who lives in Phayathai, curled up on my front seat as if she was on a plane on emergency landing. All the way all she was capable of doing was blaming her insensible drunken acts on Bon, who by that time already lost it. Two of them were challenging each other, I could have stopped them but who would have figured out that these two would turn out to be some savage drinking beasts. I took her up to her room while Bua was nursing Bon in my car downstairs making sure that he wouldn’t pukeify my interiors. At least Nam still had her senses. She knew where she was going, what she needed to do, and where her room was. She even told me how to get my parking ticket stamped and all. Not bad for a dead drunk person.

With Nam fianlly out of the way, came the hardest part. Bon. When we just left Escobar he could still talk and he assured us he could take taxi by himself from Nam’s house to his in Silom. I asked him where his house was and he just kept saying “Trong Pai” as if his senseless alcohol filled mind was thinking that he was already in a taxi. Taxi my ass, it was me trying my best to send him home with all 32 body parts in tact.

He had to go home there was no way I was gonna let him sleep in my room. So we were there near Phayathai BTS figuring out what to do with this guy. Then a solution came to me so I called Zong, one of our Workshop buddies, begging for help. Boy how lucky was I, Zong lives exactly opposite of where we were at Rachathewi Station, and mind you at the time it was 3am and he was still awake. He was a real angel of salvation on this horror of a night.

Thanks to Zong, we were finally able to get rid of Bon’s drunken ass. Zong couldn’t believe his eyes when he saw the state of his ex Workshop teammate. It was surreal. First thing we could think of was to share this stories with the CommArts authority. And I’ve got pictures to prove it in case anyone still doubts in Bon’s capability to party.

The night ended with Bua getting her car from my house. She had to wake up at 5:30am for Uni the next day and by the time we parted it was already 4am. Guess that explains Bua crashing in her class at Uni this morning and me arriving at BK hour and a half late.

Yes I am at BK right now typing up this blog post. Chris, if you’re reading this don’t blame me. I thought I was late but guess what so far I’m the only intern who showed up this morning. Guess that counts for something eh?

Sorry I had to pin this down real quick. BK’s journalistic vibe just makes me wanna write. Pictures are at home so I’ll upload them once I get home.

Edit: Pics are here. I’m posting only some of the nicest shots I’ve got. Making drunk people take pictures for you is a really bad idea.

For more just go to Bua’s