So my aunt’s five year old son, my cousin Matthew, who’s half Jewish American, is crazy.

Not like straight jacket crazy, but genius crazy, we think. The fact that he couldn’t talk until last year definitely does not affect how this dek bah thinks or acts. There have been many stories told through long distance calls from Maryland about how this kid does unusual things, like religiously counting things, hosting a Jeopardy session in front of his parents, and keeping records of how many 7-11s in Bangkok we had to pass from certain places to get home. So many that we think we should start keeping a Matt Watch Blog.

Recently, we have received another one of his quirks, this time a hard evidence, via fax last week.

It was discovered in his bedroom, neatly stabled into a booklet, among the pile of toys.

This was not a homework assigned by his preschool teacher. His mom didn’t tell him to keep a diary (What kind of 5-year-old keeps a poetic diary anyway?) nor did she tell him any of these things. It was something he did out of his little head.

FUNNIEST YET THE MOST IMPRESSIVE SHIT I HAVE EVER READ.

See for yourself:

Holiday spirit, dak bah style.