So I got all cocky yesterday when I beat the Claw. You know one of those arcade machines with plushie dolls in them and you maneuver this metal grabber thing to pick it up.

I won one yesterday at CentralWorld just after two attempts i.e. B20.

And then I discovered this:

So it’s rigged. I should have known. I think I must have spent over B200 on those machines over the course of my visits to the arcade.

Bastards, making me believe it was my own skillful and steady set of hands that made it all possible.

I name almost everything I own. Teddy bears, handbags, phones, and shoes. I find it easier you name things than having to describe it by characteristics, color or features.

My crystalized N90 was called “Nong Bling”. A teddy bear I bought once from Unicef I call him “Nong Unicef”. My Eee PC is “Nong Chew” and my recenty sold Vaio was named “Nong Pink”.

I struggled for a while to come up with a name for my Macbook. It has to be memorable and unique I wouldn’t have it any other way for my first piece of Mac.

Nong Mac? Nong Leopard? Nong Khao? Nong Book?

Then it came to me. Thanks to its snap-on shocking pick Speck case, which gives my plain white Macbook a little girly boost, there’s just no other name that would be perfect for my now fun, cheeky, PINK Macbook.

Nong ‘Ple (น้องเปิ้ล)

Ple is short for Apple and it’s one of the most popular Thai nicknames for girls. But what I like about the name the most is the connotation that’s tied to it. With this name I see a girl who dresses to kill and doesn’t really care about all the stares she gets when walking down the street.

Then I told my mom and she shot it down completely.

“Sounds like a name of a Motor Show girl.”

Guess I’ll change it to Nong Pink Number Two for now.

New Year great deal offer!

Here are the reasons why you should shop for your Thai wife.

1. Western bitches only care about success, education and well-being, your Thai wife will only care about YOU and your sexual desires.
2. She’s 20 years your junior, all your friends back home will be jealous.
3. When compared to a Western wife, a Thai wife is cheaper to maintain. And you will be helping her country’s struggling economy
4. If you don’t take her, she WILL become a prostitute and a victim of extreme violence towards women in Thailand
3. But she doesn’t mind it, though. She won’t even go to the police.

Awesome, eh? Not convinced? Watch the promotional video here.

I was dragged to the most ridiculous wedding ever.

I kinda get it to the certain extend. The groom is a son of a minister so big party was to be expected. But the whole thing tonight was like a one big show. A real show. My cousin was asked to be the host of the night to introduce the many faces of high society members one after another to come up and sing for the bride and groom.

OK those people could sing. Even better than recorded artists or those AF bitches. Think Frank Sinatra and Celine Dion. But what I don’t get is that, this was a wedding, but instead of focusing on the bride and groom and their love and all that jazz, they made the whole thing into a mini concert for the hisos to appreciate each other’s greatness.

Even though the groom, my dad’s cousin, is the son of the minister, seeing him walking around from one table to another to wai and smile I could tell his wedding was the last place he wanted to be at the moment.

I don’t get Thai weddings. It’s the most impersonal moment a bride and a groom could have in their matrimonial memory. You have the WHOLE family tree of both sides coming to see the proposal, the engagement, the wedding, and even right before the wedding night. And it’s not just them, it’s friends of the families, the extended family of the families and friends of friends of who knows who. It’s ridiculous. Everything you do is being watched and scrutinized by thousands of eyes. It’s a wedding. It’s the special moment for two people, not two hundred.

For my wedding, if there’s ever one, I’m gonna scrap all this bullshit. I don’t care if I disappoint the traditional bunch of my family. It’s my wedding, my special day and no one is gonna ruin it with a long boring ass ceremony full of people I don’t give a damn about.

The whole Sitthichai fiasco at the FCCT can now be heard online for those of you who missed the chance of insulting the guy on last Tuesday.

The Man Who Banned YouTube (Part 1)

The Man Who Banned YouTube (Part 2)